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Being accepting of autistics that wish for a cure for autism

By on June 4, 2012 in Autism

A recent news story, filled with a lot of science and interesting information, also included the insight from a man with autism, named Jeff Hudale.

You can read the news story here, in fact, I suggest you do: What’s Different About The Brains Of People With Autism?

Now, the science behind the story and the things that they are finding out about the human brain, specifically the differences between the typical and autistic brains, are really quite amazing.

But I would like to focus on the very last part of this piece, where Jeff Hudale states:

“I don’t want to quit until they finally can get this set right and get this thing eradicated,” he says. “I’d like to have some semblance of, just be a regular person like everybody else.”

There’s been a lot of talk about this through out the autism community but despite the attention it’s attracting, I see very very little (none to be honest) support or even acceptance of his feelings.

The general consensus that I see from people is that it’s sad that he feels this way and that he’s simply confused. That somehow it’s the life time of bullying, judging and other messages he receives either intentionally or unintentionally, that has caused this man to think of his autism in such a negative light.

There’s a lot to take in there as you begin to wonder if his parents had pushed for a cure or treated him differently because he was “broken.” Keep in mind, at 40+ years old, his diagnosis came at a much different time than how things are today.

Was he raised to be proud of himself or to always be aware of his differences. Did he read a lot of what the media had to say about autism and reflect those things inward?

Did years of bullying or lack of friends cause him to hate autism for making him the way he is?

Generally, it comes down to outside forces.

Put it this way, when we generalize his reaction into a “who said what to make him feel this way”, we are sort of dismissing him entirely and “putting the blame” on others.

That’s a nice way to look at it, to be honest. It means there is nothing wrong with him, it’s society that got to him and made him think this way.

However, the “nice way to look at it” isn’t always the honest way to look at it.

See, I like this news article because it’s honest and real. He is not the first autistic I’ve heard of, or even talked to, that has expressed a desire to be rid of autism. Or to use the “fighting words” version… to be cured.

I think, and this may just be me, but not everyone needs to “just accept it” and “just be proud of it”… some people don’t and never will. They simply wish that they do not have autism.

While it’s not the approach I take nor is it what I suggest, as it is obviously negative and self defeating, it is a reality.

not okIt’s a reality that should not be hidden or ignored.

Sure we could just say that Mr. Hudale should just be happy with himself despite what anyone else thinks but that’s what we think of his life.

That might not be so easy for him to think, nor is it a requirement. We can’t just demand that of him.

Wouldn’t that be more of the “stop thinking so differently and conform to what the rest of us believe!” mentality anyway?

Besides, this line of thinking ignores the simple fact of what autism really is… a disorder or disability.

There are a great many struggles, heart aches, things you can’t do, negative messages and so much more that you have to live with for your entire life when you have autism.

Some examples for some autistics include never going anywhere loud (concerts, subways, movies, etc), never being able to play sports, never being able to make friends and the list goes on and on. I couldn’t possibly list every possible thing that autism could limit or cause you to never experience at all.

There is just so much negative in life that comes with having a disability (or disorder) that it would be a bit naive to assume that it’s only due to bullies or other people that a person would wish to not have that disability.

Now, I’m not saying that it’s never the case. I think it’s safe to say that some people do hate autism or what ever disability they may have simply because of how it causes others to treat them or how others look at them.

Perhaps some of those people could grow to accept and maybe even love having autism if only people were more accepting of them.

But I think it would be a stretch to think that is true of every single person.

Some people may just wish to no longer have autism because they simply do not want to have autism. No matter their age, no matter what others say or do, no matter what you or I think they should feel… they just don’t want to be autistic anymore.

And we need to be accepting of that too.

Acceptance means we that don’t judge people for how they feel or what they think whether or not we agree or even understand it.

That goes for people who are not proud of having autism. Not just the people that are.

Let’s talk to them. Not ignore or dismiss them.

Comments { 15 }

Parents are now forcing their children a bleach enema to “cure” their autism

By on May 31, 2012 in Autism

In a mystifying case of “What the hell is going on?!?!?”, some parents are now taking to bleach as a cure… forcing their children to have a bleach enema to clean the autism out of their system.

I’m not the best at getting into the nitty gritty details and besides, these two sources handle it far better than I can. So if you have the stomach for it, check out these links and read about MMS or “Miracle Mineral Solution”:

Bleaching away what ails you
MMS, or how to cure autism with bleach. Brought to you by AutismOne

Please be sure you read those, or at least, some of those articles, before proceeding.

bleachSo very wrong

How in the world can a person go from “trace amounts of toxins in vaccines, too small to see, are harming our children” to “here honey, let’s put this stuff in you that CAN KILL YOU!”?

I just can’t fathom this way of thinking. I mean, how desperate can a person be to forcefully make their child sick? I mean, there’s a good risk of outright killing the child and yet this is somehow worth curing autism?

How badly must a person hate their child that they force them to drink bleach?

Please please please PLEASE don’t ever have bleach anywhere near your child! It doesn’t matter who tells you try it… just don’t!

Abuse is abuse

A recent news article surfaced in which two people kept their two children in a caged room, without clothing or anything, for up to 16 hours a day.. and they were charged for it. They were found not guilty in the end, but a LOT of people felt that it was abuse.

There are many more cases like this, such as a school that placed a boy in a box for several hours because he was pacing and not listening to his teacher.

People scream “This is cruelty!! This is abuse!!”

Then, some of these people turn around and give their child a bleach enema??

I just don’t get it because to me, forcing this bleach thing is far worse than putting them in a cage. It’s much more a form of abuse since it does them physical harm (not to diminish the effects of psychological harm done by imprisonment).

I just don’t get it

Anyway, I just don’t get how a parent can get mad at doctors for putting harmful substances into their child and then put something so very obviously dangerous into their child themselves.

I also don’t get how a parent can hate the hurtful things that others do to their children and then turn around and force bleach into their child, something that can kill them.

I also don’t get how this is legal. I don’t get how these people aren’t being arrested for this. Is it because a doctor told them to do it? Does that make it ok?

Because I don’t think it does. I don’t think it matters who tells you to do it, putting bleach into a child is wrong.

If I saw a parent doing that to their child, I’d call child services on them immediately and demand that the child be removed from their care.

I’d also be phoning the police.

I don’t care what doctor told them it’s ok to do it.

That’s just how I am.

I just don’t get it.

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Visiting family – One year later

By on May 29, 2012 in Autism

We made the decision to move pretty far away from my family before Cameron was old enough to start school, in an effort to get him into a school that would suit his needs rather than force him to conform to the needs of a school around here.

It was a big move as it meant separating my children, and myself, from my family. It’s an 8 hour drive so it’s not so far that we never see them but it’s far enough. Plus with extreme weather conditions where we moved, we basically only get to see my family once a year.

A year isn’t really much to me or my aunts, uncles or my mom… because we’re all adults. But to a child that is only 6, or 4, as is the case with Cameron’s little brother Tyler, a year can make a huge difference.

There’s extra inches, there’s maturity in their face, a wider vocabulary, a better sense of humour and in the case of a child with autism, like Cameron, there’s progress.

Yes, Cameron is taller and smarter now but it’s the fact that he’s willing to actually talk to people that really shocked my family. Not just talk but have real conversations.

That’s thanks to the hard work of his great teachers at the school, his therapist, our own hard work at home and of course, Cameron’s very hard work to be willing to put in the effort to try. If he didn’t want to, and I’m sure a big part of him did, he could have just shy’d away and refused to talk to them. But he didn’t, at least, most of the time anyway.

More so than that was his need to get changed in the bathrooms, not wanting anyone to see him naked. At 6, this probably should have happened earlier but as a child with autism that is not overly fond of wearing clothes as it is… it’s really a very big deal.

It’s very gratifying, as selfish as that is, because it justifies, at least to me, our decision to take our family so far away. And my family sees that and understands our decision. They understand why it is that they now only see us all once a year. I mean, they understood the decision when we made it but now we have results.

And I’m proud too. Not of my decision or of myself but I’m proud of my son. I’m proud of Cameron for making that effort to talk to people and even play with them sometimes. To get off the couch and go outside to play with the other kids a couple of times.

I’m proud of him for making so much great progress so that when we do see my family, he can impress and even amaze them.

Not every parent is able to pick up and move and certainly, not every parent sees these kinds of results from year to year… so I’m so much more grateful than any words I write here could convey.

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Jenny McCarthy announces that she will pose nude in Playboy again “for autism”

By on May 19, 2012 in Autism

jenny mccarthy playboy

First of all, I thought I’d put “for autism” in quotes in the title for one simple reason… she’s not doing it for autism.

You can read the news stories here

Jenny McCarthy is head of Generation Rescue, a charity that claims to fight on behalf of children, specifically children with autism and even more specifically than that, according to them, children that have been harmed by vaccines.

That’s all well and good, I can argue those points another time.

The fact is though, by focusing a cause on children, and then making efforts to raise awareness of those children… fighting for those children… she might as well have said that she’s posing nude for children.

See how wrong that sounds? No one goes nude in order to support children.. or their families. No one goes nude to support ANYTHING other than their own selfish, attention grabbing, publicity seeking stardom.

She’s not doing this for my child. She’s certainly not doing it for your child.

And don’t tell me she’s doing it to raise awareness because I think most Playboy readers gawkers have heard of autism already.

Oh, and the $2,000,000 she agreed to do it for? That goes towards autism in some form or another so it’s all good, right?

In the very second sentence of this post, I said that she’s the head of Generation Rescue… a charity. So think about it for a second.. who exactly is that $2,000,000 going to?

Sure, you could say it’s not in her name exactly, but I’m sure if it was Donald Trump funneling money to his own endeavours rather than to the cause he claims to support… one might have a different opinion.

Even still, even if every last cent does trickle down to the children in some way, it’s still not going to my child or anyone else’s child who doesn’t believe that it was vaccines that caused their child’s autism.

And that leaves out a LOT of children with autism. A LOT.

So again, she’s not doing it for autism.

She’s making a mockery of real causes and real issues.

She obviously isn’t making enough (publicity) out of her shameless self promotion of her books and so she’s doing this.. not for autism, but for herself. And only herself.

She’s in the news today. She’ll be in the news when the pictures come out. She’ll get herself onto the talk shows to talk about it. She’ll sell some more books.

My child will still be sitting on the couch playing Mario.

Great job Ms Opportunist… err… McCarthy.

For the record, to be as clear as I can… I do NOT support this idea, I do NOT feel it represents me or my child at all and I most certainly do NOT think she is representing the community.

This is disgusting. Not because she gets nude for money but because she does it in the name of autism.

For more on my research into Jenny McCarthy, read: The Jenny McCarthy-Autism paradox

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Musician makes connection with 8 year old, blind, autistic boy named Jacob

By on May 16, 2012 in Autism, Videos

As with any nice day when Tyler Gregory has no “gig” to perform at, he went to his favorite spot on the street to perform for the crowds that were coming and going that day.

However, what was quite rare was a most unlikely connection that he was able to make with a young man named Jacob. Eight years old, blind and autistic, this child was deeply attracted to Tyler’s music and began dancing… and inching his way ever closer and closer to the source of the music.

At one point, you could see Tyler nod to Jacob’s mom to indicate that it was alright… and then… their connection became much more than just dance. Jacob, first touching the guitar, and then Tyler’s leg… almost bringing Tyler to tears as he continued playing on.

Before you watch the video below, here is a small part of what Tyler wrote on his blog (you can read it all yourself here):

unlike most kids that come up to me with curiosity, I felt so much energy coming off of him and I was completely overwhelmed. His hand on my leg was very powerful and about brought me to tears while playing. Not because he is blind or autistic.. but because of a connection I have never felt and one that is impossible to explain. Honestly, a feeling that came from my toes all the way up my body and surrounded me. I can’t begin to explain it. I want to try to put it into words, but there is no way to tell how powerful his energy felt.

It was a powerful moment that made my day and reminded me of the good things in life. Reminded me why I love different interactions with people when playing music. Reminded me of how powerful music can be between two people. It also reminded me not to take things for granted, for most of us have it pretty easy in our everyday life. So, I just simply went home with a very big smile on my face that day, and a story to tell my close ones.

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