Archive | Autism RSS feed for this section

Autism blogs are not news!

By on August 12, 2011 in Autism

I’m finding more and more of a disturbing trend lately… where Autism blogs, by parents, are deeming themselves news media and submitting their work to Google News and other sources.

The media, especially aggregators such as Google News, make it especially easy these days for average people to be heard… not just heard, but to be included in with the other news stories.

Many news sources allow “reader opinions” or even let them write in as “editorial pieces”… which is good, to a point. However many people don’t differentiate these stories from actual, fact checked and verified news stories… not that actual journalists are a whole lot better these days, but you get the point.

fact or opinionWhen the news isn’t the news

There’s a code by which journalists go by, or at least should go by. That is that they reports facts as facts and opinions as opinions. That means that they need to get on the phone, go to the locations, talk to the people and verify that facts are facts.

The news agencies have a very real obligation to the public to bring current, accurate and fact checked information… obviously this doesn’t happen very well, especially with recent events in the media but in practice, this is how it’s supposed to be.

Blogs are a way for people to share their opinions, to add commentary to what they find in the news and to share information that they have acquired. Bloggers can do a fair amount of fact checking but for the most part, the fact checking involves what they read from the media, from other bloggers, from other websites that have random information and some people even use Youtube.

Two wrongs do not make a right

Many bloggers find that the media is slanted or even lie to tell their own versions of stories… so those bloggers write their blogs to combat what they find in the media, to argue their side of the story.

Eventually, they discover that they can submit their own stories as news sources as well, thinking that their own slant will help to balance the system but this couldn’t be more wrong.

First of all, two wrong opinions, event if opposites, have no guarantee of being right. Also, even if one is right and one is wrong, who should the reader believe? Because most people will believe one and not the other, rather than find middle ground or seek more information.

Worst of all, most people won’t even read information from both sides in the first place.

No room for a second opinion

People don’t read the news from various sources to get a second opinion. If they get their news from one source, they depend on that source…. and will rarely go to another source. Especially if it’s the same story.

Which means that they won’t fact check it themselves, they just believe what they read and take it as fact. You see it all the time when you talk to people that argue with you on current events… they’re so sure of something that you believe differently… it’s because you got your news from different sources.

If a person believes your blog posts to be their dependable news source, good for you…  bad for them. I feel bad for them because they now think your opinion is a fact. And whether you are right or wrong… no opinion is fact.

When the solution only adds to the problem

I see these blogs in the Google News lists and I cringe. Actually, I see red. It really upsets me.

These people, upset that the media is deceiving them, go out of their way to deceive people. What kind of messed up logic is that??

It’s even worse when I continue on to read them and it’s so blatantly obvious that it’s an opinion, and more so, a wrong opinion… that is so blatantly obviously slanted to their own views…. that’s what really upsets me.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with having a blog, there’s nothing wrong with even getting hundreds of thousands of readers… if people like your reading, like what you’re saying… great work! Good on you.

But your blog is not news!!!

I wish there was a way to “report” these sites or people such that they’d be de-listed because there’s just no way that they should be included with other news sources.

But as it stands, there is no way to do that. We have to filter ourselves and just hope we can recognize a blog post from a news source.

If our community isn’t messed up enough with the conflicting messages we send the public, do we really need to make it worse by doing this?!?

Comments { 0 }

Autism – Etiquette and Proper Behaviors

By on August 11, 2011 in Autism

Recently, I’ve been reading a few articles where Autistics would do or say things that society would generally consider wrong, or bad behavior, and other people would actually defend them, stating that it’s one of the challenges of Autism.

I have an issue with this.

etiquetteLearning Etiquette

The fact of the matter is that no one is born with good manners. All children have to be taught what is considered a good behavior and what isn’t… as well as etiquette. Saying please and thank you is a good start.

But more so than that, children learn how to eat with their mouth closed, to not slurp their drinks, to respect their elders and so on and so forth.

Autism Etiquette

Is there any reason that a person with Autism should not be taught etiquette or what is considered bad behavior? Of course not.

Temple Grandin often explains how her mother put a lot of emphasis on proper etiquette and how much that helped her later in life.

Children need to learn these things early with or without Autism as behaviors are difficult to change, especially if there is some lack of understanding as to the differences between various similar behaviors. That is to say, for an Autistic, one behavior could be considered acceptable, another not acceptable and yet be very similar in nature. This could confuse them.

So who doesn’t have good behaviors?

The fact is, there’s only two times that someone has bad behaviors…

  1. The child is not taught. The parents, for what ever reason, do not teach a child proper manners, etiquette and behaviors
  2. The child, or person later in life, makes a conscious choice to have bad behaviors

We’ve all said something wrong or done the wrong thing from time to time, but we usually learn from those mistakes. We usually adjust our behaviors along the way.

That applies to those with Autism as well. When you feel bad for what you’ve said, you don’t do it again.

It’s not ok to just be rude or to continue bad manners and use Autism as an excuse. It’s not an excuse. I may lead to some confusion but it’s not an excuse to live a life of bad manners.

Dear Parents

Teach your children good manners. Don’t presume that they won’t “get it”, don’t presume that they aren’t absorbing what you say and certainly don’t presume that it will just never apply to them because they have Autism.

If you want your child to “fit in” with society, you’re going to have to teach them what society will expect of them.

Some people will dismiss the bad behaviors your children exhibit later in life but no everyone will. You would be much better off instilling good manners in them early. It will serve them well in life.

Comments { 7 }

Conversations between a boy, his brain and his heart

By on August 7, 2011 in Autism

During dinner tonight, Cameron (my 6 yr old with Autism) began to explain that he did bad things yesterday because his brain told him too. His brain gave him the bad ideas and he had to listen to his brain and so that is why he did those things.

It was at this point that I decided to introduce Cameron to his heart.

Thought vs Feeling

Brain vs HeartI explained to Cameron that his brain will always want to do things… some things that are good, some things that are bad. That’s because the brain doesn’t know what is right or wrong. The brain just gives you thoughts and ideas.

I told him that there’s another voice inside him that makes him feel if something is right or wrong. It doesn’t make him want to do anything but it does tell him if what he’s doing is good or bad… right or wrong.

Cameron: “How do you listen to your heart?”

Me: “Well, it doesn’t really speak to you… it makes you feel.”

Cameron: “Feel what?”

Me: “If your brain tells you to go and play instead of eating your supper… your heart makes you feel good or bad about that. Your heart is what makes you feel if something is a good thing to do or a bad thing to do.”

Cameron “…”

Me: “Does your heart tell you it’s good or bad if you don’t eat supper?”

Cameron: “Bad.”

Me: “So even though your brain wants to go and play, your heart knows that you should stay and eat, right?”

Cameron: “I should stay and eat! I should listen to my heart!”

Decisions

Cameron: “So I have to make my heart tell my brain?”

Me: “No. Your brain tells you what it wants to do and your heart tells you if it’s a good thing or bad thing. Then it’s up to you to decide if you want to do it.”

Cameron: “I decide?”

Me: “Yes. Do you remember when mom would give you two shirts to choose from when you got dressed in the morning? She’d ask you ‘Do you want this shirt, or this shirt?’ and you got to pick which one you wanted?”

Cameron: “ya…”

Me: “Well, your brain will want to do things and your heart will make you feel good or bad about it… then you get to decide ‘Do I do it or do I not do it?’”

Cameron: “I get to decide?”

Me: “Yes. That’s why you should always listen to your heart.”

After dinner

I finished eating first but a short time later, Cameron left the kitchen table with a huge smile, went straight to his mom and said “Mom, guess what!? I finished all of my supper because I listened to my heart!”

He was so proud.

A little while later his little brother was getting into a little bit of trouble, so Cameron pulled him aside and said “Tyler, you have to listen to your heart! Then you won’t get in trouble!”

This isn’t the first time that he’s explained to us how his brain thinks up the bad things and he just has to do them. But until now, I really had no way to handle that sort of thing. A 5 year old with obvious language/understanding deficits can only be reasoned with so much.

But now…. he’s such a proud 6 year old. Still with deficits, yet wise beyond his years… and so very bright.

I have complete faith that, even though he’ll still get into trouble like any boy should…. he’ll never forget how important it is to listen to his heart.

Comments { 10 }

The truth about how a research study goes from the lab, through the media, to the people

By on August 5, 2011 in Autism

I recently wrote about how the media is causing a civil war within the Autism community… it happens with many communities but obviously my focus is on Autism. It’s why you’re here reading my blog.

In response to that, Josie commented with a link to an image which is both hilarious and, more importantly, true.

It’s a very accurate description of exactly how a study can go from a researcher’s lab/desk, through the PR office to the media, through the national and local media, through the bloggers interpretations and finally, to the people.

And sadly, like a really messed up game of Telephone where the original message doesn’t even come close to resembling the final message… the study gets very distorted until what’s being told from person to person isn’t even remotely the same as what the original study concluded.

So the next time you read about a study in the news, or see something on television… remember this image because chances are, this is exactly what happened before it got to you.

science in the media

Source: http://phdcomics.com (Click for full size)

Comments { 1 }

Being an Autism Advocate – What I can overcome and what I can’t

By on August 4, 2011 in Autism

There is one inherent problem with being an Autism Advocate. That is that what makes a person the best Autism Advocate also makes them the worst.

Sounds strange, I know but let me break it down for you, as how I see it.

The two best types of people to be an Autism Advocate are:

  1. A person with Autism/Aspergers
  2. A parent of a person with Autism/Aspergers

Who would know more or understand better than these people? Who better to stand up for their rights than the people right in the middle of it?

ObstacleHowever, think about it. Does it makes sense for a person with social and communication difficulties and impairments to be out there, speaking out and advocating for everyone? Does it make sense for a parent, with virtually no time or money, to be devoting time and money that they don’t have to speak out on behalf of others?

Parents are tired, Autistics are introverts…. Parents are busy, Autistics are usually avoiding the crowd.

It creates quite the problem when the best people to speak are the ones that are the least likely to.

There are some exceptions and there are other people that make great advocates, but for the sake of this post, I’m generalizing the majority for the sake of making a point.

What I can overcome

Social networks have really changed the world in that, you don’t have to be a celebrity or own a national news network to reach people.

My blog posts can reach hundreds, sometimes even thousands of people in a day. My tweets and status updates are the same.

And it’s not that what I do is all that great but that the people that follow me or read my stuff are so supportive and kind that they’re willing to share it with their own networks to help me reach out further.

Sitting in the comfort of my own home, I can reach thousands so long as wonderful people allow it and support me.

What I can’t overcome

I work a 9-5 job, like many people but I feel like I could do so much more if I didn’t. I can’t write like I want to, I can’t get out there and spend time with people, I can’t do interviews with people… it’s very limiting.

On top of that, even when I’m not doing the 9-5 thing, I am often doing quite a bit around the house since my wife has Fibromyalgia. Much of my off time, and even sometimes during my work time, I am doing quite a bit of chores around the house.

I live in the middle of nowhere, which means I can’t get to seminars, conventions or even out just to meet some of the wonderful parents, doctors and Autistics within the community.

No money is another big one. I can’t even buy the books that I hear about or that I’ve been wanting to read for so long.

The desire to do more

I have an itch…. I want to do so much more. I want to be more involved, I want to be contributing far more than I am.

But at the same time, I need to be a little proud of myself. I’ve been able to do quite a bit despite having so much limiting me.

The same is true for so many other advocates out there. If you reach an audience, whether that audience is 2 people or 20,000 people… just think of all that you’ve been able to overcome to achieve that. And think about, not only how good that feels, but how much good that does.

I think we’d all like to do more… and the more we do, the more we will want to do. That’s what makes an advocate a good advocate, I think.

If you’re an Autism Advocate, or any kind of special needs advocate, I want you to know that yes, I am bragging a little in this post.

It’s ok to brag a bit, so you should to. Don’t make it a big deal but feel good about what you are able to accomplish.

Even if you do find some obstacles that you are unable to overcome, you should be proud of the obstacles that you can overcome. You should be proud of yourself.

Comments { 5 }